My recent encounter with Google Support has left me not only frustrated but compelled to share a cautionary tale that could save others from the abyss of wasted time and relentless incompetence that I endured.
The ordeal began when I learned about Google's ADT promotion and $200 credit for the soon-to-be-discontinued Nest Guard. Sounds great, right? Well, not if you didn't receive the promotion email, in which case, you might as well be out of luck. I hadn't migrated my account to Google because I saw no need to, and I was blissfully unaware of the impending discontinuation of Nest Guard until last week. To make matters worse, my email system automatically deletes messages older than a month to keep my inbox tidy, so there's a good chance I missed the Nest email in the deluge of camera alerts I receive daily. And so, my predicament began.
To reach Google Support, you're required to have a Google email, which led me to create one for the sole purpose of contacting them. I then explained that my Nest equipment was associated with my Outlook email. After several minutes of back-and-forth, they insisted on verifying my Outlook email by directing me to a Google website at g.co/verify. Despite explaining repeatedly that this was not a Google account and the error in assuming otherwise, they couldn't grasp the situation and ultimately declared their inability to assist me.
Over eight agonizing calls, I was bounced around between Google Store, Google Nest, and even ADT (who inexplicably answered and promptly hung up every time). In my final call to support, I had the unfortunate experience of being harassed by a support person who, when challenged, resorted to an entirely different voice. Thanks to my frequent transfers, I recognized that Google Store and Google Nest support have different hold music, and it remained consistent during the entire ordeal. This inconsistency enabled me to confront the support person, who then proceeded to remain silent for about five minutes before rudely asking if she could assist me and "transferring" me yet again. I was kept on hold for roughly 20 minutes until an individual who spoke at an agonizingly slow pace answered, without confirming their identity, department, or purpose. He then droned on, saying, "Whaaaaaaat iiiiiiiis yoooooourrrr prrrrroooobbbllleeeeeemmm" for 15 minutes, never verifying who he was or how he could help me. He simply read me news articles about Nest Guard before declaring there was nothing they could do and no one they could transfer me to, prompting me to hang up in sheer exasperation.
In conclusion, if you find yourself in a similar predicament, my advice is simple: don't waste your time. This experience has left me disillusioned with Google and its products. As soon as I get home, I'm removing every Google product from my house. Moreover, as the IT Administrator at my company, I'm taking steps to eliminate Google products from our inventory and sharing this harrowing story with my colleagues so they can make informed decisions about their own reliance on Google. This ceased to be about the ADT promotion or the $200 credit; it became a matter of principle.
In the end, Google's support system proved to be a Kafkaesque nightmare, a Kafkaesque nightmare that I would strongly advise anyone to avoid at all costs.
